Homily for Blessing's Funeral

As I listened to the homily I preached at Blessing's funeral, I was again reminded of the grace of God at work in our lives in spite of whatever may go wrong and that God is with us, Emmanuel - the feast of Christmas. Though it may be one of the most difficult ones, this Christmas created a keen awareness of the presence of God in people, in our lives and in the Church. Here is a copy of the homily (the much captured by the video person. There are small portions missed out by him).

I started the homily by singing the first two stanzas of the hymn: It is well with my soul


When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,

When sorrows like sea billows roll;

Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say,

It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Refrain

It is well, with my soul,

It is well, with my soul,

It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,

Let this blest assurance control,

That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,

And hath “WASHED NGOZI INHIS” blood.

My dear brothers and sisters, we have come before the Lord today to pray for our sister Blessing whom the Lord has called to himself. We have come to pray that she may be welcomed to eternal life in our home truth. We are grieving but God grace is more than anything in our lives



Song: My brother (sister), cease crying for the dead, please clean your eyes (2xs). Death is a universal phenomenon, cease crying for whatever happens to one, his (her) God knows about, my brother (sister), death is a universal phenomenon, whatever happens to one, his (her) God knows about. A woman went to the native doctor to get medicine with which to raise her child from the dead (2xs). The native doctor told her to go around all the nations, when you enter a home where death never touched, get some leaves from there, with that your child will be raised from the dead. The woman went around the towns but could not find any home where death never touched. She started praying for her child that s/he may go in peace, she prayed for her child that God may bless her (him)...



Today, we are here to grieve but also to thank God for the life she gave to our sister Blessing Ngozi. The first reading from the Book of Wisdom tells us that in the eyes of those who have no faith, this is the end, but in the eyes of those of us who have faith, we know that our sister has gone before us to a better place, a place of true life, the place we all long to God. Christ himself made a promise that he was going to our father and to his Father, and that after he has gone, he will return to take us with him so that we may be with him.



Who wants to go to heaven here? (raised my left hand, everybody raised his/her hand). Who wants to die right now? None (they all started chuckling/laughing softly). Often we sing,



“Heaven is my desire, I will run the race for heaven (and all responded in chorus)

Heaven is my desire, and I will run the race for heaven (2xs)

Me: My brother (sister) do you long to run the race for your life?

All: Heaven is my desire, and I will run the race for heaven

Me: Holy Spirit, help us the grace to run, and reach there

All: Heaven is my desire, and I will run the race for heaven

Me: The comforter, help us to run, and reach there

All: Heaven is my desire, and I will run the race for heaven...”



After singing this song, we are still afraid of going to heaven, one has to die first before going to heaven, right? All responded, “right.” What really is death according to our catechism? Death is the process of the Spirit leaving the body and going to the presence of God for judgement.



According to the first reading, God has sieved them as gold is purified by fire. All those who suffered physically with Christ, are purified by him through their suffering and made ready to shine like pure gold. Their suffering may initially seem like punishment, but it is not, it is a process of preparing them for the purity of heaven, letting them go through the process Christ himself went through his agony in the garden to the death on the cross. With regards to death, like many people, she may have prayed, “God, do not let this happen to me, do not let this be my portion. The intense emotions that people in such a situation feel can be seen in the intense emotion of Christ at the garden, that prayer was so intense that blood and water gushed from him. As a person (human), that suffering was much for him, but as God, he was above that suffering. He knew that if he did not go through the suffering, we would not have eternal life as we do today. He cried out, “Father, take this cup away from me. Not my will but your will be done...” we all know that thousands of people all over the world, here in Enugu, in Nova Scotia Canada and our family friends all over prayed so hard for miracle, for physical healing if not for any other reason, then because she was very young and had a son to raise. But after all this prayer, it seemed like God did not answer our prayers. But, God listens to us, he answers our prayers. If we remember, the Letter to the Hebrews reminded us that Christ himself prayed to the one who is able to save him, and he listened to him. After listening to him, what happened? He was still crucified on the cross.



One of the priests who is with us in Halifax said that when he was still a younger priest, probably a couple of months into his priesthood, a lady once called him to ask, “You say that God answers all prayers?” and Fr. Eric responded, “Yes.” She then told him that she would enter into prayer for a very special need. About three months later, the woman called him back and said, “Father, you are a lier!” He said, “What?” and she responded, “You are a lier. You told me that God answers all prayers. Well, I have been praying for this one intention for the past three month, but God never answered them.” Fr. Eric responded, “He answered you my dear, he simply said NO!”



Sometimes, God can say no to us when we pray even though we desire for the answer to all our prayers to be YES. He knows what is good for us, and what will give us life. Truly in our own eyes my dear Blessing, we would have wished that you live, raise your child, and have grandchildren, but in God’s eyes, it is time to welcome you into the kingdom of heaven. It was not easy for Christ when he went through his suffering, in the same manner, it is not easy for anyone who goes through suffering. What made Christ cry with a loud voice on the cross must be a very difficult and excruciating pain, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” this was not said in a very soft voice as we often read at mass but probably with a harsh loud harsh voice. He knew that God does not abandon his people so he said, “Father, into your hands I commend my spirit.” Let us say the same thing Jesus said, “Father, into your hands we commend the spirit of our sister Blessing. We have in Christ and in God, we cry for her because we are human, but if we remember what Paul told us, let us not cry for her like those who have no faith because we have faith and hope that some day we shall be with our sister in heaven where we will share in eternal happiness. There, God will wipe our every tear.



So, we are gathered here to touch each other’s soul and console each other, to know that though we may not see her again for sometime, but we shall see her again in our true home in heaven when God calls us, if we do his will.



As we all know, Blessing has had to struggle with cancer for the last six year and a couple of months, for many people who go through the process of prolonged illness, there are poignant moments of not believing that this could be true, moments of feeling abandoned by God, maybe even angry at God, moments of feeling that God does not care about what goes on in their lives. In her case, Blessing had those moments, but what really hurt the most for her was the thought that she might not be there to see her son Kevin grow up and do all the normal things young people do, but I am sure she will be there for him in the spiritual sense...



She suffered both physically, emotionally, in her fears and thoughts of what tomorrow may hold. She was afraid of death, just like many of us here are, but she faced it with courage. She probably felt something that made her decide that she wanted to come home for a short visit, and she specifically requested for the flight to be booked for certain date. God knows why it so happened that as soon as she got to Lagos, she fainted and had a mini-stroke. If she missed her flight by a day, this would have happened in the United States. If it did, she may not have been able to get to Nigeria and bid her final farewell to all those who came to see her at home and eventually in the hospital. So, she really longed to come here, to be with all of you whom she had not seen for some years.



Blessing also showed the depth of her love for her son Kevin by taking him for three weeks within which they went to all kinds of interesting places and parks. She took him harbour-trotting in Seattle and had a tour of Seattle with him. She decided to have the best time ever with him for those three weeks, and even though she was already getting weak and knew she was getting sicker, she still insisted on giving him the best moments of his life. Talking with Blessing within those three weeks, one would not know that she was getting quite sick, except that she was beginning to slur in her speech and to take a bit longer to respond to questions as a result of an earlier mini-stroke.



While mom and I were going through her luggage two days ago, we found a note about a dream she had a year last June. In it, she was narrating a dream where our father who died in March of 2009 was inviting our mother to come join him because he loved her and wanted to be with her, but Blessing kept asking him to leave our mom so that she may live for us. The rest of the dram almost described what happened to her. She never showed nor discussed this dream with anybody. I think that even though this dream was written as pertaining to our mother, Ngozi was in a sense telling us that she was getting ready to be with our dad who loved her so much. So, our sister knew that God will call her some day, she prepared herself. We pray, if there was any sin she committed, that God may forgive her those sins for in her life, she desired to do God’s will. Be courageous my people, and have faith in Christ who leads along the way of truth and life. It hurts, but eventually, we will be consoled when we reach eternal happiness.



And I say to mama, our mother, it is true that the child is supposed to bury the mother, but remember that our Blessed Mother also buried her own son. Our Blessed Mother taught us to have faith in Christ. You have faith in God, with that faith, trust in God just as our Blessed Mother trusted in God. We know that if it is something prayer can change, it would have been done as all these people prayed so hard, if it is something money can change, it would have been done a long time ago, if it is something medical treatment or naturopathic treatment can change, it would have been done. Because for the last six years she had been going from one hospital to another and had all kinds of treatment. She returned home here, people came to pray. As Christ prayed, so did they. But it is not God’s will. Let us allow the will of God to be done for we cannot fight against His will. Let us put our trust in God and say to our sister (I turned to the casket and touched and said) “Go in peace, go in peace, go in peace.”